If you live in Australia and get parcels delivered to your home, chances are you've heard of Chullora.

If you live in Australia and get parcels delivered to your home, chances are you've heard of Chullora.

Chullora is where the Australia Post Teleportation Facility is. Although, one wonders why they don't just use conventional means of transport - it must be more economical.

I don't know how many times I've seen my package's tracking number zig-zag speedily across the globe, then Australia, and then stop dead in Chullora. And wait, and wait - there's one been sitting there 5 days now.

This is because teleportation takes up a lot of power - and they need to crank it up. Think the wave motion gun from Star Blazers level of power. So the power builds and builds. They have to be careful with the grid and might work with the power companies to keep some sort of balance, I can only conjecture about the logistics of it all.

The bulk lot of packages that they send around the country builds and builds too, with mine at the bottom it seems.

Then they finally push the big button, throw the switches and do that thing with the plunger, and your mail appears at the door, very quietly. And you'll get an email notification an hour or two later saying that it's been delivered. When there's a heavy load they save power by doing a bulk lot to the local post office.

So if you hear a rustle at your door, and there's a package but no sign of a postman, that's probably because there hasn't been one at all. It's not that your postie didn't knock, it's just that Chullora has just hit the switch.